January 19, 2009

Proper Fulfillment

Lately i've been bothered by a classic case of uneasiness. I can best compare it to that nervous feeling we get when we're about to meet "the girl" we haven't seen for a long period of time, mixed with the emotional feeling you get when you've drank 3 too many cups of drip and are on the verge of tears for no apparent reason. I feel like there's usually something greater I could be doing with my time and feeling such a passion for things like video and riding that watching a well filmed video or beautifully ridden video part gets me all fired up. My mind starts going bonkers and before I know it the shop owners walk in wondering why only half the task list has been completed. I love day dreaming, I love writing and I love loving and I believe these things often interfere with my daily life. Something I also love.

I'd rather not pin-point why I feel the way I do. Things sometimes are better left unsaid. For me to attempt to justify my irresponsible behavior would be slightly irresponsible in itself and part of growing in the Lord is knowing what to say and when to say it. Of course along with that is knowing when to not speak at all. A sense of maturity.

here's a perfect example of something that'll get my head turning. it's beautiful, showing you what a good lens will do.

I had a thought, an epiphany, a vision you could say:

Recognizing growth in humans is like watching flowers blossom on a choke cherry tree.

The year must have been 1990-something and Mr. Hubof was not only shorter than me but also my 4th grade teacher. It was Arbor Day at Ponderosa Elementary and everyone was to be handed a tree while leaving class at the end of the day. Now my grandpa's always been a huge logger and since I can remember i've had an interesting obsession not only with trees but plants in general. Receiving the tree and being way too stoked, I made my way home and planted it directly into the ground in our small trailer park yard. Forgetting about the tree I grew and somewhere between 4th and 9th grade the tree had grown, likewise. Surviving the Ice Storm of '96, a million skids and a park job or two from my fathers Bronco. The tree was standing 4 ft tall weighing in at 2.5 lbs and sprouting not only its first flowers but a few small cherries. I had no idea what kind of tree it was and although it came with a tag informing me of such things i'm sure it fell of on the walk home from school. I haven't seen the tree for a good year now but the last time I had it was close to 20 ft tall and taking over the whole front yard of that pitiful trailer home. To think that coincidently enough, me planting that tree would one day remind me of how awesome Gods grace always is. Awesomely strange isn't it?

I tell you about my childhood cherry tree simply because Christ has shown me something ridiculously rad. He says our lives are similar, so as long as we've had that seed planted, whether it had been my small hands or a yard keepers trained skills, we all have the same potential to grow in Him. We've had the tire skids, the cars parked on us and the long periods of Ice Storms bring us down. God tells us to rejoice in our sufferings. Doesn't really make sense but when I think about it I wouldn't trade a single day of jail time if I would have known that i'd have ended up like this one day. Crazy to think how much differently we're able function through God and the simple mindset He gives us. Always take everything into consideration and always consult in your best friend, Jesus Christ. He never seems to fail and if for some reason you're questioning the outcome, don't, because like the Choke Cherry Tree, one day it'll prevail in ways you'd have never expected.

'For by grace you have been saved through faith and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.'   Ephesians 2:8&9

1 comment:

  1. The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me.

    Psalm 138:8

    Strong post my friend. I love the too much drip comment. I think its like a high but it allows you to re-evaluate ones self. So vulnerable and sometime we need to be put in that situation to get ourselves off the pedestal we climb up on.